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Club Buzz

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#1 J. Scott

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Posted 15 August 2019 - 05:26 AM

Club Buzz is a popular bar in the area. On weekends, it converts to a night club with live music or a DJ Friday & Saturday nights. The place is often packed on weekends with a sizable line to get in.


$8 cover on weekends. There is a full bar, dance floor, and pool tables in the back.


3441 Halsey Ave. Ft. Shannon 

Cross-street N 5th st.




#2 J. Scott

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Posted 15 August 2019 - 05:38 AM

*Caldwell pulls onto Halsey Ave. I sit in the passenger seat.*


'Hey man. Thanks again for driving. I'm glad you're the responsible one...because I plan on being fucking belligerent tonight. I'm stoked. I haven't been out since Lana dumped me. I appreciate it.' I say.


'I don't know how you got lucky enough for the wife and kids to be out of town.' 


*I sit there excited. Club Buzz is pretty lit on Friday nights.*


#3 M. Caldwell

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Posted 15 August 2019 - 05:46 AM

'After that fight that we had earlier you need a few drinks, and yeah last thing I need is the wife to complain I'm coming home late and drunk. Last time that happened she said I came in to the bedroom half naked screaming I'm here to pillage and then the next day I had to get a wall patch kit because I fell into the wall.'


*I say with a chuckle as I park the car.*


'So what are you drinking tonight?'

Deputy Mike Caldwell





#4 E.Raven


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Posted 15 August 2019 - 05:52 AM

*I DJ everyone's favorite goth tunes in the back hoping the off duty fuzz that just walked in don't recognize me.*

#5 J. Scott

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Posted 15 August 2019 - 06:04 AM

'Taquilla shots, my man.' I say happily. 'First round's on me!' I say.


The line isn't too long to get in. We get out of the car and head over and start standing in line.


'Hey man, I'm just going to warn you. If you see me walkin out with some broad...you have my blessing to just bounce whenever. I mean..there's no guarantees, but I plan on not giving a single fuck tonight.'


We stand in line and make small talk. There's a couple of cute girls in front of us in line. They're wearing form fitting and deliciously revealing clothing. The two dudes they're with look like complete tools. They're too busy talking about fixing up their cars. Caldwell and I make small conversation with them, exchange a few laughs, and before we know it, he reach the front of the line. I pay my cover, and we enter. 


The music is loud. The DJ...not bad. Not as good as DJ Panzerschlag when he comes around...but hey. Lots of people dancing. The prospects look good. At a quick glance I already see a few 8 or 9s out of 10. 


'First order of business...the bar!' I shout loud enough for Caldwell to hear me over the loud music.


I approach the bar and wait for a minute. As I wait, two seats open up. We grab them and have a seat. The bartender eventually comes over:


'What do you want?' he shouts at us.


'TAQUILLA. TWO SHOTS.' I shout back. The bartender pulls out the well taquilla and starts to pour two shots.




The bartender brings us the two shots with small lime wedges. I hand over my credit card and open a tab.


I hand one shot to Caldwell.


'TO A LIT ASS NIGHT' I shout as a toast. We clank glasses and I take my shot. I follow it quickly by sucking on the lime.


#6 E.Raven


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Posted 15 August 2019 - 06:10 AM

Seeing everyone drinking I take another sip of my pabst and load up the next track, flawlessly transitioning from the track before. 



#7 M. Caldwell

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Posted 15 August 2019 - 09:01 AM

'Tiquela shots! Sounds like theres gonna be some pillaging tonight!'


*I say as I suck down my shot and suck on the lime. a few rounds later I move to the dancefloor and stay near the edge*

Deputy Mike Caldwell





#8 J. Scott

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Posted 15 August 2019 - 11:21 PM

As the night goes on I drink myself stupid. Caldwell and I start chatting it up with randoms around the bar. The tunes are good, the drinks, even better. After I had gotten four rounds of shots, and 3 whisky sours in, I was in a good place. The world was getting fuzzy, my body felt numb, and I just no longer cared about a damn thing. I was happy and having a good time. Now that I was adequately liquored up, I decided it was time to hit the dance floor. 


I try my hardest to walk straight. I have trouble feeling my feet as they hit the ground. My body wants to sway...but with what little brain power I have...I manage to keep composed and do a pretty good job to not look completely sloshed. 


Once I get to the dance floor I set up near Caldwell. I notice a group of girls, probably college age, dancing. I work my way towards them and start talking to one of them. She reciprocates with some short replies and a few smiles. Any sober person could tell she felt uncomfortable getting hit on, but my brain was not registering the subtle cues. After a song or two, the group leaves the dance floor. Deeming that they weren't worth the effort, I head back over to Caldwell.


"Fuck it. I'm breakin out the big guns. Getting laid or bust tonight!" I shout near his ear over the loud music. I move towards the center of the dance floor, clumsily navigating through the horde of people....searching for a new target.


There it was. 5'4"...burnette hair...perfect body...short, tight and revealing black dress leaving nothing to the imagination...and best of all...no guy around her.


My drunk ass makes my way to her. It's time for the big guns....


I approach her and start dancing in sync in front of her...side to side...smooth as a fox. She looks at me, I look at her...she smiles..I smile..trying not to look too much like a drunk-ass mofo.


I reach out and grab the palm of her had. We continue dancing. Next I lift her arm up and draw her in closer, she turns in the process...the grinding begins.


Damn...this shit was too easy. 


The grinding gets nastier as the song goes on.


Jackpot! This girl's a freak! I love it!


The song smoothly transitions into the next. We separate and change our dance to fit the new song. We continue to dance for about a minute.


I'll be honest and say, I have no idea what the hell she was trying to do, but she spins in front of me and loses her balance, falling to the floor and landing on her butt. She lets out the biggest laugh. She's as drunk as I am! I bust out laughing as well as I reach to pull her up off the floor. I pull on her arm and she gets up off balance and falls into me. We end up in a hug, and she starts to move her hips and dancing with her hand around my waist. She laughs...I laugh...I feel her give a light squeeze to one of my butt cheeks.


Oh sweet baby jesus. It's a done deal.


After about a minute of intimate dancing, her giggling and smiling turns into surprise and fear as she looks over my shoulder.


'Shit' she lets out as she releases her tight grip on me.


'Aw, don't give up on me baby.' I say in desperate drunkenese.


'It's my fucking boyfriend.' she says.


No sooner had she said that, I felt a hand forcefully placed on my shoulder. The hand tugs me and turns me around.


#9 M. Caldwell

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Posted 15 August 2019 - 11:59 PM

*As jJay drinks his old man drinks.*


'Whiskey Sours? You want to pay with your AARP card dude,'


*I say between shots.*


*I get another Jack and coke in me. I start chatting up this college age blonde.*


God if only I wasn't married


'So yeah I'm a cop, Used to be in the Navy...'


*After a few minutes of regaling my tales*


'And thats why you don't trust a bunch of sailors with a Japanese man in an Elmo costume, Almost caused an international incident' Finishing my story to a roar of laughter after the blonde girls friends came.


*Another girl walks up to us, I recognize her as someone Jay was trying to take home.*


'Hey I don't want to sound like a bitch, But... you have to keep your friend under control he was making me feel really uncomfortable.'


Goddammit Jay I think to myself


'Yeah i think its about that time we take our leave'


*I turn around and see Jay making a complete ass out of himself on the dance floor.*


Hes not getting laid tonight.

Deputy Mike Caldwell





#10 J. Scott

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Posted 16 August 2019 - 12:20 AM

I get turned around and see....nothing...except the top of a shiny bald head. I look downward and see what looks like a giant midget. The dude couldn't be more than an inch over 5 feet tall, with a shiny bald head, gold chain, and no less than two gold rings on his short sausage fingers. Despite being short, he looked well built.


"Can I help you?" he says angrily yet sarcastically. I look at him.


My brain tells me to apologize and leave.


*I bust out laughing*


He stares at me. He looks pissed.


'You grinding up on my girl?' he asks as he starts to get into my chest...err...face..


'Nah man...I....I'm sorry...' I say trying to suppress my laughter.


My brain thanks me for apologizing and initiating a retreat. My mouth on the other hand...


'....I'm sorry...I didn't realize she was into midgets.'


I didn't think it was possible, but his faced began looking even more pissed than it already was. He puffs out his chest and bumps me.


'The fuck did you just say?' he says angrily.


I've completely composed myself now.


'Nothing man...nothing....' I say as I take a step back. 'It's just I didn't realize santa let the elves out the workshop.'


'Mother fucker' the dude says as he sucker punches me right in the jaw. I stumble backwards, landing on some people dancing behind me.


Good job Jaydon. You deserved that. Now back off.


I straighten back up. I place my hand on my jaw.


'Damn, I thought you guys were supposed to be jolly.' I say rubbing my jaw.


'Yeah..keep talking with the big ass mouth of yours.' he says getting closer to me again.


Retreat Jaydon. Retreat damnit!


'Alright man....alright. I'm out...' I say backing up a step. 


The guy stops advancing. I start to turn around.


'Yeah that's right...walk away little bitch.' he say to me as I'm halfway turned around.


Fuck this guy.


I quickly turn back around and charge him. Spearing him, we both end up on the floor. I'm deaf to the commotion of the crowd around us. I lay, one....two...three quick punches onto the side of his face. I feel someone pull me off of him with great force. I'm be dragged away by someone. The guy gets back on his feet. Someone is holding him back from charging at me. We separate further and further.


'Come at me you short little fuck!' I shout as I'm being dragged away.


#11 M. Caldwell

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Posted 16 August 2019 - 12:30 AM

*Grabbing Jay*


'Were getting out of here Jay'


*Looking back I see the half a man quickly recover from Jays strong yet highly uncoordinated fists of fury. He starts berating his girlfriend who is taller then him before following us through the crowd. I have Jays arm with one hand.*


'Dude what the fuck are you doing. Your going to get collared'


'He punched me first'


'I know but you know PD is going to lock both of you up.'


'As we get to the door little man catches up to us'


'Where the fuck you taking your buddy, This aint over, '


'Listen, Were not here to steal your pot of gold, Were leaving.'


'No me and your friend are going to talk!'


*I hear a Low voice*


'I think its time for all of you to leave.'


*I turn around and see a very tall intimidating black man with an earpiece and a name tag that reads Jelly*

Deputy Mike Caldwell





#12 J. Scott

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Posted 16 August 2019 - 12:40 AM

'He punched me first' I say trying to defend my actions.


As Caldwell continues to drag me I continue to hurl insults.


'Help. I can't catch up to him with these short little legs' I say loudly in a sarcastic high pitched voice, making fun of the short guy trying to make his way back to us.


I provide a little resistance to Caldwell.


'Man let go of me, I don't need your damn help. I can take him.'


'Your drunk as shit Jay.' Caldwell informs me.


'I'm drunk enough to kick his ass man! let go of me!' I say in protest.


The short man finally catches up to us and says that he and I need to have a chat.


Okay Jaydon...you've fucked shit up so far....please....please....be diplomatic for once in your fucking life.


'Yeah sure we can talk...we can talk about opening up a cereal shop you fucking leprechaun!' I say giving my best effort at diplomacy.


Another bouncer arrives and stops the short dude from clocking me. Caldwell continues to drag me.


'Ok. ya'll need to get your asses outta here. Now!' the bouncer tells us. Caldwell drags me out into the parking lot.


He drags me through the front doors.


'Ooohhhh they're after me lucky charms!' I say in a high pitched voice as the door starts to close behind us.


#13 M. Caldwell

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Posted 16 August 2019 - 12:47 AM

'Jesus fuck dude. You got us roadhoused.'


*I say almost in disbelief because that hasn't happened to me since I got out of the navy.*


'Fuck it, We need to get home and you need to sober the fuck up'


'But the girls and then mini me showed up'


'Your a fucking animal.'


I say laughing,


'Lets get back to the car and find a white castle or some shit. Something to absorb the booze.'


'Can we get my new friend a happy meal.'


At this point I can't control my laughter.


'Did you see his girl was like 3 inches taller then him!'


*Saying as we start walking towards my car*

Deputy Mike Caldwell





#14 J. Scott

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Posted 16 August 2019 - 04:18 AM

'The guy was a fuuuuckin hobbit. I thought I was on the trail to mordor.' I say starting to drunk laugh.


I've composed myself, but have developed a mild case of the staggers.


Caldwell puts my arm around his shoulder and starts to help me to his car towards the back of the large lot.


'That guyzz a ffffuckin tool.' I say.


Shit did I just slur? I think the alcohol is starting to kick my ass now.


'Fuckin lucky charmssss' I start giggling as we hobble down the parking lot. 


We make it about 40 yards from the front door before a woman's voice starts shouting.


'Hey wait!' the voice lets out. I hear the sound of high heels clanking on the asphalt at a running speed.


'Wait!' the voice says. We stop and slowly turn around. It's the girl I was dancing with!


She catches up to us. 


'Hey! I...I'm so sorry about that. My boyfriend's an asshole....and I can't believe he hit you like that. Are you okay?' she asks, lightly touching my jaw where I got punched.


'Nahhh, I'm fine.' I say with a drunken half smile. 'He was nothing.' 


'Well. I've had it with his shit. He's a fucking ass and I'm just done.' she says frustrated, fighting back tears.


'Hey....isss alright.' I say drunkenly touching her shoulder lightly.


She composes herself. 'Yeah.....yeah....I'm fucking done with him. I'm fucking done!' she says as she turns around and starts to walk back inside.


Caldwell puts his arm back over my shoulder and helps steer me back the other direction. We take a few steps towards the car.


'Wait!' she says as she comes back to us. We turn around again.


'My name's Sydney.' she says with a smile.


'Jaydon' I say in reply with a half drunken smile. 


'Well Jaydon, maybe...we can continue our dance some other time?' she asks.


'Sssure....I'd....I'd like that.' I say with an even bigger smile.


There's an awkward pause.


'Do you have anything? I can give you my number.' she asks me.


'....nooo...I...uhhh' I say drunkily not able to think and struggling to close the deal.


Caldwell gives me a nudge and whispers into my ear: 'Pull your phone out dude, jesus.'


'Oh!...yeah...my phone's right.....here...' I try to search for it and find it. I pull it out. Struggle slightly to unlock it and hand it to her.


She enters her phone number and hands it back to me.


'I'll see you later Jaydon?' she asks.


'Yeah....ssss...ssure' I say as I clumsily put my phone back into my pocket.


She starts to walk away back towards the club.


Caldwell starts to laugh as he turns me around: 'Well I guess tonight wasn't a total loss for you. You're a real fuckin romantic, you know that?'  The sarcasm was strong, but I was too drunk to notice.


I'm in shock at what just happened. Perhaps it's the alcohol really starting to set in hard, but none of this seems real. Yes. It's definitely the alcohol.


We make it another 20 yards to Caldwell's car. He props me up against the passenger side of the car. I'm still able to stand, but he makes me use the side of his car to keep my balance.


'Lets get your drunk ass outta here.'he says as he unlocks the car.


I stand facing away from the club towards the street, in a slight stupor. 


'Fucking midget.' I giggle to myself.


'Ohhhh....shit.' I hear Caldwell say softly in a tone of voice I've never heard him say before.


'HEY ASSHOLE!' a voice yells in the distance


I turn around and see the short guy quickly walking towards us, about 60 yards out.


'Shit, Jay...it's time to go.' Caldwell says as he opens the passenger door and tries to grab me. 


The trunk pops up on a jet black Chrysler near where the short guy is. He walks up to the trunk, opens it, and pulls out a tire iron. He continues to walk quickly over towards us. 


I start walking towards him a few steps.


'Come here asshole. We need to finish our little chat!' he says, tire iron firmly in his grip.


'Fucking bring it on you Bilbo Baggins mother fucker!' I shout back.


'The fuck are you doing Jay!?' Caldwell says as he quickly grabs me.


'I'll fuck this dude up. I'mmm trained for this shit.' I stay stubbornly resisting Caldwell's tugs.


The short guy gets closer, tire iron at the ready.


Caldwell opens the back door of his car and with all his might tosses me into the back seat.


He shuts both passengers doors and runs to the driver's side and gets in.


'Oh yea...big man with the fucking tire iron! Fuck you' I shout face down across the back seat of the car.


I hear Caldwell start the engine and start fucking booking it out of the lot. 


'Son of a bitch!' I hear the short man shout. His shout is immediately followed by a huge metal on metal THUD coming from back of Caldwell's car as he pulls away. 


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